You find yourself hospitalized with a serious condition for the first time. "But I'm only 45," you think to yourself. Brought into the ER three days ago, you nearly die in that sterile room with the funny smell. You pull through, but there are tests, and more tests, and the "vampires" show up every twelve hours for a blood sample--not just one tube but three. You can't go to the bathroom by yourself. The virility you once felt is gone.
But things slowly get better. Your numbers get better, and you find out there are lots of numbers. Too many numbers to keep track of. You finally get discharged, but the prognosis for recovery is kind of bleak. None of it seems right. It doesn't fit, so you get signed off to see a specialist. They figure it out, the prognosis for recovery gets a lot better. You are happy with that.
You settle in at home since you are in no shape to work and focus on getting better. The euphoria of hope that you will live a long life is replaced by the day to day rigors of recovery. New diet, new exercises, your life is changed in a big way. Thirty minutes in a chair and you get up stiff and sore. Your body aches horribly all the time. But you slowly improve. More tests, doctor visits every three weeks. But you improve. A year later you are back at work, having made some lifestyle changes but the stiffness and pain hasn't gone away. It is less severe but still there.
Your doctor, nutritionist, and a lot of other people will tell you what to do to get better. but having gone through this experience myself at age 47, I suggest you supplement that with your own game plan. For me the three steps outline below got me through the experience.
Knowledge. While faith is important, knowing in some detail what you are suffering from and how to get better empowers you. Medicine is not an exact science. We assume doctors' knew what they were doing, but with all due respect, sometimes they don't. You will speak with at least three different physicians on the hospital staff who drop by to see you everyday--your primary physician and usually two or three supplementary ones. You ask each the exact same question and get three totally different answers. What do you do?
You read and learn about your ailment. That knowledge allows you to understand what the medical folks are saying, what types of questions you need to ask, and when to seek a second opinion. You are being fed a lot of bad news about your future from doctors, but your condition continues to improve dramatically. You and your family's frustration reaches a point where you demand a second opinion and referral to a top notch specialist. You research the possibilities and narrow it to three or four doctors. You find one that can see you soon and you make the trip. They deal specifically with the disease you are suffering from and pinpoint the problem. Your search for knowledge has paid off...the prognosis is much better.
Support. There are different types of support. While you may be suspicious of the doctors, the support staff--nurses, blood techs (the infamous vampires), and cleaning staff are often good sources of support. You see them regularly. They get to know you and you them. Sometimes it is like another member of the family coming in the door.. They always show up smiling, asking how you are, and respond with a chuckle to your stories and jokes. Maybe it is supposed to be a "good cop, bad cop" thing, with the doctors being the bad cop, but what's refreshing is a hospital staff that excels at being the good cop.
Support from friends and family is important to recovery. First, they remind you that people want you around and want you to get better. Second, they can do some of the footwork chores you normally stress over so you don't have to. Of course, if married with kids at home, your spouse will do the job of two parents Other family members will take shifts to be there with you and assist with researching your particular ailment so you are knowledgeable. Friends will show up to help keep your spirits up. Nothing like a hospital room full of fat men on a Monday night watching football. Even if you are the kind of person that does not want to be waited on, enjoy the support, embrace it. And know that more than likely you will do the same for them some day.
Humor. This third key might best be titled "stay positive" but humor is a great way to cope with a bad situation.. Unless you have been confined to an uncomfortable hospital bed for days, no one realizes how awkward it is when they visit you. You are laying there in a degrading hospital gown and visitors look at you with such sympathy. It is actually a downer so use humor to lighten things up. They may be stupid little jokes and comments, but if it brought a smile to the nurse, custodian, or visitor then it was worth it. Anything to cut the tension. You have to laugh at your situation, even if it is not something to laugh about, because humor is therapeutic. Not every patient is like that, but you have to find a proactive way to cope with your health issues. For many like me it is humor.
These three keys do not end once you leave the hospital. You will probably spend time rehabilitating and you should do so based on knowledge, support, and humor. I spent six months out of work and each one was painful due to my body repairing itself. It can be psychologically painful to. Did you let my family down? The problems of life are still there, what do you do? You can't physically do as much, so how do I adjust to that. My answer: learn about it, be sure to tap into your support network, and take it with a smile on your face.
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